ANNA NICOLE'S MOTHER ALLEGES MURDER PLOT...

The Anna Nicole Smith spin just keeps spinning out of control. Now her mother, Virgie Arthur, says she believes that her grandson Daniel's death from a drug overdose may have been MURDER. The bereaved Texas grandma told Nancy Grace on CNN Headline News that she thinks the perp was in the hospital room at the time of his death. Mmm...the only folks in that room other than poor Daniel were Anna Nicole and her full service personal attorney, Howard K. Stern, who claims that he, and not Larry Birkhead, is Anna Nicole's baby daddy. Is your head spinnin' faster than the kid in the "Exorcist" yet?!

Granny "Smith", a former cop, said of Daniel's lethal overdose of methadone and antidepressants: "Somebody had to give it to him. He had to get it from somewhere." Leaving little doubt as to the Blame Name, she talked to Grace about attorney Stern marrying Anna Nicole legally and being in line to inherit her millions if anything should happen to her. "If Howard Stern marries her and she ends up dead, then who does the money go [to]? Danny's not there," Granny hypothesised.

TMZ obtained a copy of the birth certificate of Anna Nicole's daughter, Dannielynn, which names attorney Stern as the father. Her marriage to him AND legal demands from Larry Birkhead for a paternity test can't be far off.

Lions and tigers and now murder, oh, my!! We hope to resolve at least one issue next week in our podcast: "Anna Nicole Smith's Baby Daddy Revealed". Stay tuned!!

MEL GIBSON...What would Jesus do?

Eyewitnesses report that allegedly contrite alcoholic actor Mel Gibson yelled at a young man who accused him of being anti-Jewish outside a Malibu church last week: "I'm not anti-semitic. You F**CKING better apologize right now!!" The devout Christian family man allegedly pointed his finger at the young man in a menacing manner. One witness opined that the judge should have sentenced Mr. Gibson to Rageaholics Anonymous, as well as AA.

MADONNA...AT LONG LAST MADAM, HAVE YOU NO SHAME?

After strapping herself to a crucifix, straddling a human horse in bondage gear and then recreating herself as a children's book author who spreads the gospel of Kabbalah to Third World countries as a condition of a $3 million donation for education... Madonna's outdone even Madonna THIS time. Cutting threw the red tape of years on an adoption wait list, Madonna went to an orphanage and got herself a one-year old boy from the impoverished African AIDS plagued nation of Malawi. Only problem is he's not an orphan. His mom died at childbirth and his dad and granny, who love him dearly, don't have enough money to keep him. Universal outrage is building that Madonna should have waited her turn AND given money to the tot's dad to raise him in his African homeland.

If this is a publicity stunt for her new children's book coming out October 24, all we can say is retitle it: "The ABC's of staying on top for 25 years: Use your crayons, boys and girls, to copy dead sexpots, S&M mistresses, then make the transition to a new persona with a dead Madonna/whore named Evita until you slide into the revered Dr. Seuss slot as a children's author, then complete this latest incarnation with a copycat adoption of a Third World child just like Josephine Baker in the 20's with her Rainbow Tribe of 12 kids, Mia Farrow in the 60's with her brood of 13, and Angelina Jolie with her adorable Ethiopian and Cambodian adopted tots in the New Millenium."

Suggestion for your next kid's book: "Proust for Children as told in one, long unpunctuated sentence by the major domo chameleon of the 20th & 21st centuries, Madonna, call me Esther..."

GOD TRIPS CAN BE DANGEROUS...

Reuters, Kiev, Ukraine - A man shouting that God would keep him safe was mauled to death by a lioness in the Kiev zoo after he crept into the animal's enclosure, a zoo official said Monday.

The man shouted, "God will save me, if he exists," lowered himself by a rope into the enclosure, took his shoes off and went up to the lions," the official said.

"A lioness went straight for him, knocked him down and severed his carotid artery."

This Ukrainian obviously forgot to heed that Old Russian Proverb: "Pray by all means, but keep rowing to shore."


Now, be the FIRST to go out and spin the down and dirty truths behind the headlines...

MADONNA ON AFRICAN BABY BUYING SPREE...

Continuing her copycat ways, Madonna is now one-upping Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt. She's adopted a 13 month old African tot who's not even an orphan! After seeing a boost in Namibia's tourist trade after Brangelina's sojourn there for the birth of their daughter, the country of Malawi decided to be a copycat, too, and granted Madonna special dispensation for adopting little David Banda.

New York Post columnist Andrea Peyser articulated what many readers e-mailed in a story headlined: Shameless Star Buys an African Souvenir..."(Madonna) has her heart set on raping Malawi. Days ago, she lined up 12 African boys, hand selected for her scrutiny. She picked out 1 year old David to take home in her luggage...The boy selected in this freakish slave auction is no AIDS orphan. He's got a biological father, plus a granny, but was placed in an orphanage after his mother died. His family loves him. They just can't afford to keep him. If Madonna possessed a speck of sanity or shame, she would write a generous check...Madonna should nail herself on her crucifix, for real this time."

Madonna's gone too far THIS time, even by her own ever devolving standards for reinvention. There's talk that hubby Guy Ritchie is bitterly opposed to this latest publicity stunt, oops, sorry... planned adoption. He feels his wife's daughter by another man and THEIR biological child is enough to cope with in view of his wife's unceasing efforts to conquer the world and put her brand on everyone's derriere. FREE LITTLE DAVID BANDA FROM VEGANISM, KABBALA INDOCTRINATION AND MEGLOMANIA NOW!!!

ANNA NICOLE TRAPPED IN HER OWN LOONEY TOON

Now the former stripper and TrimSpa poster girl has shed another 200 pounds... her Bahamian lawyer. He's like so FIRED! Seems there were violent disagreements with Anna's personal, full-service lawyer and self-confessed "baby daddy", Howard K. Stern and her Bahamian mouthpiece Michael Scott. As Perez Hilton deduced: "It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out what probably happened: Anna and Howard wanted to do some shady shit and this lawyer dude would not lie!"

A lawyer who will not lie for his client? Isn't this grounds for a suit for incompetence and malfeasance?!!

MEL GIBSON INVOKES THE SODDI DEFENSE...

"Some Other Dude Did It" is the most mundane, classic defense invoked by millions of common criminals around the world when facing the music for their misdeeds. The usually imaginative and talented superstar billionaire, MEL GIBSON, showed an utter lack of originality and self-knowledge when he told ABC's Diane Sawyer in an interview aired this morning that his anti-semitic tirade the evening of his July 28 drunk driving arrest was not him talking. It was Jose Cuervo!! The Passion of the Christ director alleges that tequila was to blame for his "insane" behavior and he admitted that when drunk, he has the capacity to "murder inanimate objects", including toasters. He also went on to say that anyone who doesn't understand that what a drunk man rants and raves about is not anything that he would ever think of sober...

Oy vey, knock if off already and fess up to the WHOLE shmear, Mel. You cannot be successful in an AA program without RIGOROUS honesty. Your daddy Hutton bombarded you from the crib with his anti-semitic tirades and you had little choice. We know you love and honor your father...but grow up and think for yourself. And if you do share his views, be honest and tell the world the truth. The "truth" isn't a business decision. The truth is the truth. And by the way, your self-confessed vanity in gussying up for your mug shot speaks volumes about you, Mr, Gibson. What would Jesus do?

HOLD THE MAYO AND LETTUCE, BUT NOT THE POT...

Three Burger King workers in Los Lunas, New Mexico are in a pickle after serving two cops Whoppers sprinkled with marijuana. The hungry officers started chowing down when they noticed the meat had been sprinkled with a substance that looked like pot. A field test kit confirmed the illegal substance. The cops had the three overzealous employees for lunch...


Now be the FIRST to go out and spin the down and dirty truths behind the headlines...